The most wonderful time of the year?

Why tinsel and plastic won't (and doesn't need to) paper over the reality of winter

Sitting in Brighton Dome watching my youngest singing classic Christmas crooners and Carols in the choir was a moving experience as a parent. BUT… (not least having paid £36 a ticket to be there), I couldn’t help but question, ‘is it really “the most wonderful time of the year”?’

Both from the perspective of Winter being an unnatural time for a great deal of activity (see Wintering) to the unsustainability of another consumer fest in the face of global climate collapse, multiple genocides, hunger strikers nearing death, anti-trans rhetoric and far right on the rise, child poverty, etc, etc, etc… I’ve been wrangling for years to extricate myself from the construct of Christmas. My family are not Christian, we don’t eat meat and we’re not big fans of Coca Cola.

It’s largely a relief not to get caught up in the frenzy that feels so at odds with both our values and energy levels. Yet… there are still the conditioned voices that nag at the back of my head (from a lifetime of those ingrained crooners singing about the best time of year) that I should be giving my kids the most elaborate meal of their lives, piles of presents and that we should all be a lot more glittery in wear and attitude.

And, of course, hope and joy are both vital and valid to bring us strength and courage.

These are practices that I turn to to ground and bring me back into a more natural sense of being an animal wintering, ie: not doing so much, reflecting, dreaming and resourcing until the more energetic time of Spring starts to show its new shoots.

DIY Rituals

Making meaningful memories feels far more important than subscribing to the dominant narrative of mindless spending and consumption. On the Winter Solstice, one of my daughters makes Mother Winter’s Wish Bread, which we embed with intentionality and hope. We reflect on the darkest night and sit with the shadows until the sunrise brings the new cycle of light and life.

This year I will be on the beach with friends to welcome the Sun, and there will be tales, fire and remembrance for what has passed, as well as light and love to hold us through the more difficult months before Spring Equinox. As with nature, the cycle takes its time and we will wait beyond the construct of January 1 for the rebirth of Spring.

Do you have family or heritage rituals that have meaning to you? If not, you might research or create those which connect you to and honour the people and land where you feel home.

Metallics (beyond the sequins)

Late Autumn into Winter is related to the Metal Element in Traditional Chinese Medicine, associated with transformation, organisation, setting boundaries and re-establishing limits. Winter and the process of slowing down offers the opportunity to reflect on what this transition and resourcing might feel and look like for you.

You could explore these prompts, either in your journal or for contemplation as you sit, or walk, or maybe in conversation with a trusted other:

• What aspects of your life need a slower energy right now? Which parts of you are asking for pause?

• What might you let go of as you move into Winter?

• What would you like to make space for in the stillness?

• What are the obstructions to your allowing yourself space and stillness?

Enlighten your body

At this time of year, you might pay particular attention to your lungs, where you absorb what you need and release what the body does not - this process of drawing in and letting go with each breath can be a guide towards balance between clarity around what is really needed and making peace with the grief of Winter’s ‘endings’.

• Make yourself a nest with plenty of cushions and blankets so you can lie comfortably and warmly, where you won’t be disturbed. You might like to wrap your head in a cotton scarf or use an eye mask.

• Bring quiet, easeful attention to your breath.

• Focus on these empty spaces within your body; you might notice on each exhale a feeling of emptying, being empty of fixed Self, connecting with a sense of being impermanent, and on each inhale, imagine cool white light filling the space:

  • Outer collarbone, inner elbow, end of thumb (Right then Left)

  • Index finger, back of the wrist, back of arm, V of the shoulder, side of jaw, opposite nostril. (R/L)

  • Lungs (R/L)

  • Kidney space (R/L)

  • Deep belly, behind your navel (R/L)

  • Base of your pelvic bowl

  • The space between the front of your forehead and the back of your skull.

• Lie in stillness, gently awakening from your belly out to your toes, expanding back outwards into the room, taking your time.

The invitation with all of this is to enquire afresh what is meaningful to you about this time of year and what is not? What may even feel like a burden that you could relieve? What constructs do you notice that you comply with that don’t actually align with your values at this time? Where there is perceived pressure from others, could you initiate gentle conversations to reassess what would be most easeful for everyone?

Blessings to you all, Dear Friends, at this time of darkness and reflection. Lean into the shadowy dreamspace and see what might evolve,

Leo xxx